Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Why Bernanke is a Glorified Bodybuilder

In a parallel universe, Ben Bernanke grew up in the inner city.  To get away from the violence, he turned to bodybuilding.  The first thing he learned from his bodybuilding mentor, Tyrone, was the importance of nutrition.  To stimulate a weak and puny body, Bernanke needed to get on a calorie surplus, but taking in too much calories over his maintenance will just make his body inefficiently partition his nutrients into fat.  Sure he looks stronger in the short run, but in the long run, his body is a ticking time bomb full of high cholesterol, high blood pressure, and pre-diabetes.

Meanwhile, in our universe, Ben Bernanke grew up in a middle class family.  To get away from the riff raff, he turned to central banking.  The first thing he learned from his central banking mentor, Alan, was the importance of setting interest rates.  To stimulate a weak and puny economy, Bernanke needed to lower interest rates, but lowering them too much from equilibrium will just make the economy inefficiently allocate capital into wasteful sectors with no organic demand.  Sure the economy looks stronger in the short run, but in the long run,  the economy is a ticking time bomb full of sector bubbles, scams, and borrowing from the future.

In other words, Ronnie Coleman for our next Fed Chairman.  Yeeeeeeaaaaahhhh Budddaaaayyyyy.  Cuuuuuutttt Raaaatessss Baaabbbbbyyyyy.

My Jam of the Day: